No Record of Wrongs

Taken from the Live Like You Are Dying Daily Readings ... Week 4; Day 1

"...and I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."  Those seven words from the song "Live Like You Were Dying" are definitely worth pondering.

What causes us to deny forgiveness?

Revenge.  When you have been hurt deeply, the natural human respons is to want the person who hurt you to go through an equal amount of suffering.  Even the Old Testament law calls for an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.  It is an equal and fair form of justice, but God's grace works on a different basis entirely.  Grace refuses to seek revenge and it forgives.  Jesus modeled this for us.  1 Peter 2:23 (NLT) says, "He did not retaliate when he was insulted.  When he suffered, he did not threaten to get even.  He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly."

God knows that if all of us were to receive just payment for our sins that would be the end of the human race, so he has forgiven everyone and asks us to do the same.  It's a remarkable turn of events but it's the only way there will be any healing or restoration in broken relationships.

Another reason we might deny forgiveness is that we want to hang on to our hurt because it has become our identity, a ready excuse, a smoke screen that blots out other problems we don't want to face.  Consider the beggar in John 5:6 who had been sitting by the healing pool for thirty-seven years when Jesus came up to him and asked him if he wanted to get well.  He didn't exactly say a hearty "Yes!" Instead he went into his well-worn excuse -- his catch-22 that no one was there to life him into the pool -- and skirted the question entirely.  Some of us have been so identified with our anger and bitterness that we are afraid to let go and forgive.  How differently we would live if we refues to use our hurt to gain attention and sympathy.

Or perhaps we deny forgiveness because we have never believed in our own forgiveness.  Ture forgiveness begins there.  If we can't forgive ourselves, we are going to find it impossible to forgive anyone else.  Judgment and blame of others always grows out of unresolved guilt.  Forgive yourself first by accepting your forgiveness from God, and then offer that forgivenss to others.

Living like you were dying cuts through all of these diversions.  It's pointless to go to the grave with an unforgiving heart.  Dying puts a real crimp in anyone's plans for retribution!  Like the cartoon of a gravestone that reads:  "Now will you finally believe I was really sick?" there's just no benefit for the dead!  You might as well forgive now.

One of the definitions of love in 1 Corinthians 13:5 is that "[love] keeps no record of wrongs."  It's that simple.  Ask God to give you short-term memory loss when it comes to people who have wronged you. 

It's the only way to break the cycle of retribution that causes wars in our relationships.  Start by receiving your own forgiveness from God.  Then settle the issue once and for all against those who have harmed you by forgiving them first in your heart and then, if possible, to their face.  Stop being a scorekeeper and throw away your scorecard.  An unforgiving heart is an unnecessary tragedy that only hurts the one who possesses it.  You have precious little time life.  Just let it go.

Reflective Thoughts -
1.  Is there something in your life for which you are having a difficult time accepting God's forgiveness?

2.  Search your sould and see if there are any grudges toward someone deep in your heart.  You may need to spend some time doing this because we train ourselves not to see these things and allow them to eat at us slowly.  Ask your closest friend, spouse, or children who they think you need to forgive.

3.  If you are holding a grudge against someone, forgive that person in your heart right now -- don't wait another second.  God is ready to embrace you in the courageous step.  You are not alone.  Now make a plan to extend that forgiveness face-to-face if necessary.