Risky Love

Taken from the Live Like You Are Dying Daily Readings … Week 3; Day 4

“She would go to church if she felt like she would be accepted, but her sense of shame keeps her back.  She’s gotten as close as the parking lot, but cannot gather enough courage to get out of her car.  How will she explain this aborted trip to three anxious kids after talking them into coming?  She doesn’t know, but she decides that will be easier than explaining why she doesn’t have a husband to all those happy Christian families she supposes are inside.

Then the memories of the church women’s retreat someone convinced her to attend come rushing back to her.  All of the teaching and discussion had been about marriage.  Most of the jokes were about everyone’s husbands stuck at home with the kids.  She did not find this funny.  She would have taken any of their husbands for even a day of relief and role modeling for her fatherless sons.  A new relationship with one of these women would have made the weekend worthwhile, but no one sought her out or made any attempt to follow up.  They were all too caught up in the similarities of their own lives and shared experiences.

Unfortunately, this is a scene played out in all too many churches that have not learned to care for those at risk in their body.  Jesus said, “If you love only those who love you, what good is that?  Even corrupt tax collectors do that much.  If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else?  Even pagans do that.”  (Matthew 5:46-47 NLT)

Or to put it another way:  If you only love those who are just like you, you are acting like a country club and not a church.

One of the surest ways love can be recognized in the body of Christ is the degree to which love is extended towards those who may not able to give anything back, at least not right away.  Many of these people stay away due to guilt and a sense of condemnation.  The initial challenge is to help them know they are welcome.

One way to do this is through acts of kindness or love in action, such as advertising free services to single moms (or whatever group you might agree to target) – car tune ups, house repairs, yard work, babysitting – no questions asked.  It’s all about being sensitive to those outside our norm.  We picked single moms so we could go a little deeper with this, but the same applies to pregnant girls, the physically and mentally challenged, kids on drugs, single dads, seniors living along, recovering addicts, and the list goes on.  This is both risky love (outside of our comfort zone) and loving those at risk.  The hope is that new and accepting relationships can naturally flow out of these acts of kindness so that some of these people will get farther than just the parking lot.

It’s time to love deeper.  That deeper love will be risky, but only then will it get beyond what tax collectors and pagans do."

Reflective Thoughts –

1.  Reread paragraph 2.  To what extent can we create pain in others without even noticing it?  How can we become more sensitive to those with different life experiences than our own?

2.  Come up with a game plan to put love into action.  How can you enlist the support of others in the church to do this?  Be sure you treat those you reach out to with dignity.  One of the best ways to do this is to listen to their story.  Make sure they feel like a friend with something to offer.  The last thing anyone needs is to be patronized.